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and during such cold summers
we discovered braids in our hair
and let our laughs cry out
while we ran naked
into soft grass
into arms
where we would watch each other cry


casseroles for dinner
we'd capture the nostalgia of midwest u.s.a.
where i left my mother on the first night i was seventeen
and i followed him to the rooftop where the gravel fell
dust dust knowing heads, while i sat on a milk crate
and ventured into the park skipping and singing don't you pimp out my heart
i sold you shoes in hushed tones

and on the morning that i cut your hair
you named our goldfish echo
so the memory would linger for him
you wrote songs on our walls and painted over them twice
to punish the future


and now as we freak out climbing rocks
impressing the waters below, i feel your weather
this is our last summer
your whisper reminds me
oh dont you pimp out my heart
dont you pimp out my heart
of the look i earned when our eyes first met

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Terrible angels who call us
The sly upward turned corners
Of the mouth
Entice us leaving us breathless
Because the mad beauty found in the innocence of the eyes
Because her round face
And small eyes weave mysteries in the depths of them
Lean in I need you
The mist which swarms the room and my whole soul
Surely it is she, carved completely out of ivory
Who comes into the room dancing
Natural and simple, movements so light
I am in love with her.
Elation forms the joyful light kindled in my eyes
Pleasure displayed by the curve of my pale lips
I only wish to save myself, but I don’t know how.
I do what I’ve been taught and what I’ve been enabled to do
The mist which swarms the room and my whole soul
Seizes me with despair
I appear a butterfly, free to flutter my rainbow wings
I drop my arms listlessly and sink into the clouds with my slight body
Fallen entirely into submission.
Mystic attraction that draws me in to her
Handsome and elegant face
Utterly enchanting, satanic
There is something cruel in her charm
Which I wish I would mirror.
Now I understand, when she crushes me and I crush you
That the uncontrollable radiance in her eyes burn me
As she speaks the words
I am her doll.
Stick me with needles
And I will obey
She will eat her supper, and go away

childish

i don't remember in history
once when
irony fell so plainly

when something admirable
converted into something
detestable

are my thoughts really as impressionable as to alter
every
single
time

i refuse and i loath
and it makes my toes curl
and my back lean forward
and my eyes squeeze shut

yeah and you thought you knew me